You Are Already Married.
Now Truly Understand Each Other.
You and your spouse each answer the same questions privately. The system gives you one honest compatibility report of your own marriage — where you align, where you differ, and the conversations worth having together.
💑 This Is Not a Verdict on Your Marriage
This is the same thorough questionnaire used to evaluate compatibility before marriage — applied to the marriage you already share. It is not about whether you should have married each other.
It is about understanding each other more deeply than you ever have. Understanding why your spouse reacts the way they do. Seeing how their upbringing shaped their expectations. Discovering what they need from you that they have never been able to say directly. Noticing the patterns behind your recurring conflicts — and finally having the conversations that lead to real change.
Every difference in the report is an opportunity for growth. Every topic is a door worth opening.
Create Your Free Account →Not the version of yourself you wish you were. Not the answers you think your spouse wants to hear. The truth about who you actually are, how you actually feel, and what you actually need. Your spouse never sees your individual answers — the system compares them privately and generates your report.
The more honest you both are, the more accurate your report — and the better the conversations it leads to.
The Part That Makes This
Unlike Anything Else
Most questionnaires ask about hobbies and surface preferences. We go somewhere completely different — the emotional and psychological dimensions that determine, more than anything else, whether your marriage is a source of joy or a source of quiet pain.
Your Childhood Is Still Shaping Your Marriage
Whether you each grew up in a warm home or one with tension, divorce, or emotional distance — it shaped who you became. Understanding this about each other explains years of what felt unexplained.
Subconscious Patterns Behind Real Conflict
Unresolved anger, emotional insecurity, and childhood wounds don’t stay in the past. They play out in the marriage every week. The report names these patterns so you can work with them — together.
Can You Give Love — or Do You Need to Receive It?
One of the most painful mismatches: both spouses need love and neither has enough to give. The report assesses emotional availability honestly — so you can finally see each other clearly.
Conflict Patterns — Compatible or Combustible?
Does he shout? Does she go cold? Do either of you harbour silent resentment? These patterns — rooted in childhood — are at the root of most recurring arguments. The report shows you exactly where yours clash.
Religious Life Goes Deeper Than You Think
Shabbos, mikvah, Yirat Shomayim as a lived reality, trust in God when things are hard — these are not just practices. They are the texture of daily married life, and mismatches here create daily friction.
Every Difference Becomes a Conversation
For every meaningful difference the system finds between you, it generates a specific topic to discuss together. Not to alarm — to open the door to conversations you may never have had.
Developed by a Chabad professional pre-marriage and marriage counselor with expertise in hypnoanalysis — someone who has spent years understanding the deep psychological patterns that determine whether two people can truly build a life together.
Simple to Use. Profound in What It Reveals.
Four steps to a full compatibility report of your own marriage.
Both of You Register — Free
Husband and wife each create your own account in minutes. Your answers stay completely private — your spouse never sees them.
Each Complete the Questionnaire
Answer separately, at your own pace. Progress saves automatically. Most people say it felt less like a form and more like finally putting words to things they’d never been able to say.
Find Your User IDs
Each of you sees your own User ID at the top of your Profile page — just copy the number shown there. You’ll each need it for the next step.
Enter Both IDs — See Your Report
On the Shalom Bayis Report page, enter the husband and wife User IDs. The system instantly generates your full compatibility report — strengths, differences, and topics to discuss.
Religion & Jewish Identity
Observance, Shabbos, mikvah, Kollel, Baal Teshuva, Yirat Shomayim, trust in God when things are hard.
Family Background & Childhood
Your parents’ marriage, emotional environment, divorce, animosity, and how your upbringing shaped who you became.
Love, Emotions & Attachment
How you each give and receive love, emotional availability, and what each of you needs to feel genuinely secure.
Personality, Character & Conflict
Anger patterns, criticism, jealousy, possessiveness, forgiveness, resentment, and how you communicate under pressure.
Work, Career & Finances
Breadwinner expectations, who stays home, bank accounts, financial philosophy, Kollel expectations.
Goals, Purpose & Values
Purpose in life, marriage philosophy, Aliyah, where to live, long-term direction as a couple.
Children & Parenting
How many children, Jewish schooling, secular education, and how you each plan to raise your family.
Lifestyle & Daily Life
Television, travel, eating out, music, socializing, cooking, pets, and how you each enjoy spending time.
Health & Medical Background
Family health history, personal health, Tay Sachs / Dor Yeshorim, disabilities, hereditary conditions.
Marriage Roles & Expectations
Role of husband and wife, decision-making, equal partnership, spiritual orientation, purpose as a couple.
What Your Compatibility Report Shows
Not a score and nothing else. A real, honest picture of how the two of you align — and exactly where the meaningful differences are.
Compatibility Score
A percentage based on how your two sets of answers align across all 10 areas — weighted by what genuinely matters in a Jewish marriage.
Serious Issues — Shown First
Halachic concerns and deep psychological differences displayed clearly at the top. Nothing buried. Affiliation differences are intentionally excluded — you are already married.
Topics to Discuss Together
Where your answers meaningfully differ, the report lists specific conversation topics — shown side by side with His Answer and Her Answer. Not problems. Opportunities.
Print & Keep Your Report
A clean printout to keep, review over time, or bring to a rav or counselor. A tool for conversation — not a verdict.
Each Spouse Answers Privately
Your spouse never sees your individual answers. The system privately compares both questionnaires and surfaces only the areas where you differ — shown side by side in the report. Your full questionnaire stays completely private. Always.
A Note for Rabbis, Mentors & Counselors
Those who guide couples do sacred, irreplaceable work — and Shalom Bayis is here to make that work more powerful. When a couple comes to you, the full compatibility report gives you a deeper, structured picture of where they align and where they differ — what to explore, what to handle with care, and what to affirm. The wisdom and the personal touch remain entirely yours. We simply give you the most complete picture possible to work with.
You Are Sharing Personal Things. We Protect Every Word.
Each Spouse Answers Privately
Husband and wife answer separately. Your spouse never sees your individual answers — the system compares them privately and generates only the report, showing areas of difference side by side.
Your Answers Are Never Exposed
Your spouse never sees your raw answers. The report surfaces only the specific areas where your answers differ — nothing else is ever shown to anyone.
Secure, Encrypted & Deletable
All data transmitted over HTTPS, stored securely, never shared with third parties. Delete your account and all data permanently — anytime, no questions asked.
Understand Each Other.
Build a Stronger Home.
You chose each other. Now truly understand each other. Both of you answer the questions, enter your two User IDs, and receive a full honest report of your marriage.